PUERTO RICO The View From La Perla - La Vista Desde La Perla

Orig posted on Myspace 28 AUG 07

PUERTO RICO 8/07 The View From LA PERLA!

PUERTO RICO!!!

What a great four days with the girls! The only problem with staying in Viejo (Old) San Juan is that you gotta DODGE las CUCARACHAS (JUMBO GIGANTIC TROPICAL ROACHES) in high heels on fkn cobblestones! It was very 'Creepshow' at times, and those mo'fo's fly right at you! YUCK!!!! We stayed at Hotel El Convento (The Convent), ha, ha, more pix to come...

I was on a mission to see La PERLA, the 'Hood, located on a cliff between the 500 year old walls built by the slaves for the Spanish, and a rough patch of the Mar Caribe, where only surfers and cadavers dare swim... To enter La PERLA... you can't be a VISITANTE (visitor) without a RESIDENTE (resident)! Enter at your own risk... We were supposed to get a graffiti tour on Fri or Sat, but it didn't work out. Sun nite we were introduced to 21 year old PAPOLO, from La Perla, and set up a tour with him. Papolo is a kid from the streets, he was kicked out of 6 colegios (high schools) and had an unhappy childhood... yet he has completely turned his life around and now empowers others to do the same. Somebody gave him a chance and he ran with it. He will soon be the first male from this neighborhood to graduate from college, he is studying to become a pilot, and he is a living legend over there!

We began walking through the 'PEARL', admiring the many colorful murals and narrow pathways connecting one casita (little house) from the next, and happened upon TEGO CALDERON filming a video for his single, "Ni Fu Ni Fa"... it's like a big extended family in there, con tios y primos (aunts, uncles and cousins) everywhere. The steep streets and numerous alleys zig zag through very intimate living spaces, and they have the best view on the island!

After La Perla, we saw the movie, Illegal Tender (John Singleton, Tego's in it), TERRIBLE dialogue, but it was the perfect ending to an incredible day, and the guy I had just copped my piragua (shaved ice) from was even in it!

LOVE 2 All!

¡Qué grandes cuatro días con las muchachas! ¡El único problema con permanecer en Viejo San Juan es que hay que ESQUIVAR las CUCARACHAS (ESCARCHOS TROPICALES GIGANTESCOS ENORMES) en TACOS (altos talones) en los guijarros! ¡Era mismo "Creepshow", y esos diablos volaban a encontrarnos! ¡YUCK!!!! Permanecíamos en El Convento (el convento), ha, ha, más pix del hotel coming soon…

Yo estaba en una misión para visitar el La PERLA, el barrio situada en un acantilado entre las paredes de 500 años construidas por los esclavos para la España, y un remiendo áspero del marcha Caribe, donde solamente las personas que practica surf y los cadáveres se atreven nadada… Para entrar en La PERLA… No puede ser un VISITANTE sin un RESIDENTE! Entre en su propio riesgo… Nos supusieron conseguir un viaje de la pintada el viernes o sabado, pero no lo se resuelve. El domingo, por la noche, nos presentaron a PAPOLO, 21 años , de La Perla, y fijamos un viaje con él. Papolo es un cabrito de las calles, lo golpearon con el pie de 6 colegios (High Schools secundarias) y tenía una niñez infeliz… con todo él ha cambiado totalmente su vida y ahora autoriza otras para hacer iguales. Alguien le dio una oportunidad y él funcionó con ella. ¡Él pronto será el primer varón de esta vecindad a graduar de universidad, él está estudiando para hacer piloto, y él es una leyenda viva allá!

Comenzamos a caminar pa' la 'PEARL' , admirando los muchos murales coloridos y caminos estrechos que conectan un casita (poca casa) del siguiente, y sucedido sobre TEGO CALDERON que grababa un vídeo para la cancion, "Ni Fu, Ni Fa" … tiene gusto de una familia extensa grande adentro allí, los primos de los tios y de la estafa por todas partes. ¡Las calles escarpadas y los callejones numerosos zigzaguean a través de espacios vivos muy íntimos, y tienen la mejor panorama sobre la isla!

Después del La Perla, vimos la película, Oferta Ilegal (de John Singleton, con Tego), diálogo TERRIBLE, pero él era la conclusión perfecta a un día increíble, y he comprado mi piragua (hielo afeitado) del hombre que estaba en el film! ¡AMOR para todos!

Queen For A Day! 50th Annual National Puerto Rican Day Parade NYC 2007

50th Annual Puerto Rican Day Parade 2007 NYC

QUEEN FOR A DAY - My View from the BACARDI FLOAT.

!!!QUE BONITAS BANDERAS!!! ALL 2 MILLION of them!!!

WEPA! !!!Que Viva Puerto Rico, La Isla del Encanto!!!

What a beautifully CHAOTIC day! It was GREAT - when I wasn't kissing ass! I was a multi tasking delegate between way too many Bad Lieutenants, beat cops, mentally fkn challenged traffic cops, parade organizers, Bacardi Suits, Bacardi Girls, DJs, artists, "Security", Bacardi "event planners" and my Philadelphia friends who refer to themselves as "Carnies", who setup, breakdown and drive the float. It was not easy, but I'm VERY good @ customer service, AND I even cleaned the damned plexiglass windows!

EL ABAYARDE himself, Sr. TEGO CALDERON, was RIGHT NEXT to us FOR HOURS!!!! They pulled him off the route right before the turn onto 5th Ave, because la gente goes bananas and mobs him, he IS the man, after all!

I had planned to be a journalist, armed with my camera, my video cam, and a cell cam - or perhaps the comic relief... I was dressed very modestly - strictly business, in a boxy black windbreaker and jeans, with a Puerto Rico visor. For most of the morning I was covered up, it was freezing out! JAJAJA (hahaha) and the BACARDI girls were BUSTED!! Seriously!! Cellulite for days, I could have PROUDLY worn my poompoom shorts, UM, two kids later!! ThankUVeryMucho! I was just as cute, OK, it's true, WAY FKN CUTER than those mujeres plasticas (plastic women, Gringos)! In the beginning I was nervous, expecting average, run of the mill (ridiculously fkn gorgeous) Boricua women would show up in bikinis, plus it was a quite "NIPPY" 69 degrees out, and let's be real, I'll never aspire to be a beauty queen (it's what's INSIDE that counts), but these broads were HAGS! OK, 1 or 2 were cute, but nothing like MY GIRLIES! I was telling everybody up on that float I could have filled it with calderas nand nalgas (hips & ass) in 20 minutes! Once I saw we started to roll I revealed a Puerto Rican flag spandex tanktop, my handy marine whistle, a flag in my back pocket, belt w/ flag buckle, y mucho - pero mucho orgullo!!!

Before anyone else, I was up on there with the crew, so that was MY float, but one Bacardi girl was trying to ask me for water like I was a waitress or something, uh, the cooler's over there, hon, I pointed with my flag, then turning my back to her, proceeded to "Party Like a Rockstar"!! Oh, NO you didn't, now go back to being my backup dancer! BK don't play!

A float has absolutely NO suspension, so when the music jumped off, I was literally 12 inches off the ground, holding on, waving my flag shaking what little my mama gave me like a doggone fool! It was Hip Hop Hayride heaven, and through some miracle I had become the prima ballerina, the one dressed differently! I played the back, by the fellas, dancing more like a crunk cheerleader than a video ho, while the Bacardi girls threw mad shade!

DJ Precise from La Kalle 105.9 (Heavy Hitter) made the most out of TOBY Love's "Tengo Un Amor" and other songs by splicing in El General, C & C Music Factory, Nina Sky, Frankie Cutlass and Fat Joe with little hits of old and new school into a hot loop... His crew from the South Boogie Down was cool, one guy kept "singing" to me, and I hammed it up like a true Broadway Baby, I was crying, swooning, walking away, it actually looked choreographed!

I had the GENTE raising those flags, on the left, on the right (alzando las banderas, pa' la izquierda, pa' la derecha), GOZANDO, picking out the Papi Chulos with my flag, calling out the city names, tirando besitos a los viejitos (throwing kisses to the little old men), WOW, I am still reeling from the ridiculous amount of Puerto Rican LOVE I ingested, and puro adrenalina (pure adrenaline)!!! What a dream come true for a Nuyorican!!!! Outrageous!

At the end of the parade route, DJ ENUFF, the King of the Heavy Hitters, Hot 97, my old pal from Brooklyn walked up, and to the surprise of Precise and crew, who had been nothing but nice to me all day, told them all just how far back we go! That's RIGHT! I was like, I TOLD Y'ALL I'M FROM BK!! Mad props to ENUFF... I love that guy, and I go far back enuff to have been to his Momma's house parties!!!

WHAT A DAY! Not only was I just as cute as the bodega beauty queens, diplomatic, energetic and funny, but I even had GUM, OK!? Will be doing it again next year, I think I earned my keep! Maybe I need to hop on for GAY PRIDE!!! I bet the BACARDI boys will be WAY prettier, and I hear they wave their "FLAGS" at HALF MAST for the WHOLE parade! OUCH, sounds kinda painful, but like "LOADS" of fun... OK, I'll stop now...

50th Annual Puerto Rican Day Parade NYC
2007!

Con todo mi AMOR!JULIANA K MALA ERES! W E P A !
AMOR OMNIA VINCIT! Be the change you wish to see!